Whatever Happened to Pizza at McDonald's

After working as a personal butler to a deranged, elderly former actress, I inherit her fortune upon her untimely death and use it to procure a commun...

In a follow-up to last week's episode, I question my favorite prayer hotline about why they hung up on me for asking if God and Satan could "bury the ...

I would like to induct the pioneering pizza enthusiast Mr. Ozzy Osbourne into my celebrity hall of fame, but hesitate to do so on account of he worshi...

Our Canadian deputy journalist files a report on his country's "new" McPizza Bites, which are part of McDonald's Canada's crime-glorifying Internation...

After a long hiatus wherein I was evicted from my New York City apartment and hitchhiked across the United States to return to Los Angeles, I detail t...

My thoughts on the election of the latest pope are put on hold as I deal with a copyright dispute concerning the unauthorized use of my image in a You...